Some hold on to the past. Reason has nothing to do with what we feel or think about our past. Only that we say “If I could go back and know what I know now I would do things differently.” Yet, we know that this is impossible.
We are humans. We know this if we believe in the Bible and the stories and Scriptures. We are told that we are human and we will make mistakes and we will sin. Again we know but do not follow what we know is true.
Do I live in the past? At times yes! More than once a day I think about the past and what would life be like if the path before me had another path to choose from. In other words “If I knew then what I know now.” I can not help it. We live this way because we feel guilty or maybe the path was there and we were to arrogant to see it.
Life is a circle. The earth the largest circle of anything we can actually see with our own eyes. Would I have done things differently? Yes, Do I blame myself for the many decisions I made that ended put me in the position I am in today.
Maybe I should have never left her, maybe I should have never joined the military, maybe I should have stayed closer to home, and maybe I should have never gone to college when I got out of High School.
Yes, these are questions that haunt me. Mainly because I think that I can not be forgiven or that I can not forgive myself. But I must say that feeling from the past are still within me. Those words hurt me now. They cut deep within that space that my heart use to be. I never ask for it back that night.
What step is this? A step that makes you second guess the path of your life and that other path that you ignore. God leads us if we listen. But when we turn away from him we loose contact with him because stop listening. He still speaks no matter what we do. We just have to listen.
When we turn towards God and ask forgiveness, he has already forgiven us. We start listening again. However our mind being human still wonders off to that point in our past and even though we have God we will question either his silence or his answer.
Step by Step we walk the path. Some call it the Red Path. Some call it the straight and narrow. Some say that we should take the path that is rarely used and turn away from the straight path or easy path because that one will lead us astray. So Step by Step we walk that path and along the way our life changes. Once it has past it can never be returned. Walk softly on that path and make sure you follow it and not stray off of it for any reason. But know this. You will always question your past.